Nightmare
I’m walking through the forest; I wish I’d stayed at home. I’m not safe. Something’s not right, the fresh forest air has become polluted and the world around me is eerie silent. Then I hear it .
A SCREAM!
A CRACK!
Before long ,I’m running. I stop to catch my breath, tears rolling down my face. I realize what’s happening.
Creeeeak!
A tree collapse inches for where I stand. I look around one last time , I see my home destroyed.
Darkness
An earthquake!
I sit up, sweat pouring down my forehead, relief washes over me. No earthquake, the ground is still. I hop out of bed to get a glass of water. I stop. A buzzing. It’s getting louder and louder. I rush to the window.
No!
Not again!
Buildings tremble and quiver under the force of the earth. What if this time it’s the end.
Hi jemima
I really like it the way you kept stopping at the ends of sentences and moving onto a next paragraph.
I also like your short sentences
Lauren
I like the description: A CRACK! A SCREAM! Because having a short sentence is very effective, and also, because you have them in different paragraphs, you can hear the pause which is very effective.